The Nude Journal

08:04 John Humphrys' smug faux-annoyance makes me want to self-harm. #
11:13 @davidwhittam has the correct opinion about James Bond films. #
12:36 "A horse is a horse?", he wailed, his face ashen. "Of course, of course!" she smiled, her fingers tightening around his neck. #badhorror #
12:48 @rhodri The smile on the Social Media Consultant's face froze as he realised that he would never tweet again. #badhorror #
13:47 My hat, it has 3 corners, 3 corners has my hat. And each corner the site of a gruesome murder. #badhorror #
13:51 Finally, she got the match alight, then stared aghast into the visage of TV's Paul Ross. #badhorror #
13:56 "But the train driver couldn't have been my father!" exclaimed Stephens, "My father is dead... dead tired of driving trains." #badhorror #
13:59 "Everyone who watches this film dies within 7 days. Unless they sit through the director's commentary without falling asleep." #badhorror #
14:13 @rhodri You say that, but could Twitter do better? Let's find out with Twitcom! (shoots self in head) #
14:57 @amuchmoreexotic "Oi vey Adrian, that was the first trick I ever learned!" #
15:57 I keep winning tickets. Anyone fancy going to this: tinyurl.com/cuswfd for NO MONEY? #
16:37 40 hours since last cigarette. Intake of chewing gum increasing exponentially. #

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